Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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