dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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