I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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