I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
