i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
