3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
