Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
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