Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
