god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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