I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Randomize