So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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