She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
