I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
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