yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
