My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
