saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
