And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize
