So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
