I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
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