Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
