Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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