so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
