i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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