her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
