Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Operation Purity has been aborted
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
