A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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