today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
i now understand why vodka
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
