can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Randomize
