whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
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