Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
