p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
