yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Terrible idea I love it
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Randomize
