Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
