thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
