he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
