its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize