I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Please don't give away my fajitas
Randomize
