Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
