You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
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