i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
