Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
