I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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