I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
