if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
