my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
ok first of all what the fuck
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
