Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I just had sex on a roof
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
