but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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