theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Randomize
