Do you still have your period?
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
