The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
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