You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize